Dear Friend,
I had the most interesting experience this last week—a little traumatic (in an unexpected way) and most enlightening. My sister found some old class pictures online and forwarded them to me. These photos included me from age 6 up to age 10/11. Now, the trauma didn’t come from just seeing old photos—embarrassing fashions from the early 70s—but rather from the memories evoked by the first picture that then cascaded through all the pictures and then through the rest of my time in school.
Our wounded inner child!
As first I wasn’t even sure if the first picture was of me, as it could have been my sister. However, I fully remember that classroom and sitting in that exact seat doing art. I also remember another time when I was sitting at the other side of the same table, about where the photographer was standing. Both of these memories involved me being told off by the teacher for doing something wrong/being bad.
Memories
In one memory, we were working on our choice of art project and I decided it would be really cool to draw lines dividing the large sheet of paper into quarters and then into eighths, and then I set about coloring each of these triangles in. However, it was a large piece of paper and I saw pretty quickly that, not only would the end result be unpleasing to the eye, but that it would also take a long time to complete the nonsensical task. I therefore scrumpled up the paper and went to throw it away, only to be told off by the teacher for being wasteful. I was 5/6 years old, in a class of children I barely knew, being reprimanded by an adult stranger who had absolute authority over me. I was afraid of her, afraid of not being good, and afraid that my classmates would witness my humiliation. The teacher was totally uninterested in my reason for not wanting to finish the project—my practical and realistic reasoning did not matter! I never told anyone about this incident and locked the memory away for almost 50 years.
In the next memory, the school bell had just rung for the end of the day. The teacher told the class to be quiet and sit up straight so we could all be dismissed. At first I sat up straight but then I observed the other children. Like lots of kids who compete to be the best so the teacher will pick them, they were all sitting up so straight and tall that their bottoms barely skimmed their chairs, and all of them were bouncing in their excitement at doing this task the best. Suddenly I saw how ludicrous this all was. The point was for the class to be quiet and calm, so they would then leave the classroom in an orderly way. This did not require trying to reach the ceiling with their heads while still remaining in their seats, and they were anything but calm—excitement was waiting to explode out of each and every one of them! I therefore sat back in my seat, perfectly quiet and well behaved—even back then I had an aversion to mindless sheeple behavior! Unfortunately my teacher was not impressed and I was kept behind and reprimanded for my bad behavior! This story I kept to myself as well, only telling Eldon about it 40 years later.
The trauma that arose from seeing this one photograph came in the realization that that six-year-old little girl was still within me. Seeing that one photograph brought back all of those memories as though they had just happened . . . and a host of other memories too.
Little Traumas – Big Traumas!
A new school year has just started and lots of people are posting pictures of their kids in their new clothes, white socks and backpacks stuffed with books. It’s a time of great pride, and many kids are excited about being a year older. Unfortunately, what I realized in seeing these pictures and remembering stories that everyone shares at some time or another, was that school sucks! If we are the lucky ones, then our school years will have a number of these little traumas—being the last to be picked, not being the teacher’s favorite (again!), not being pretty enough, tough enough, or smart enough, and being laughed at. And overlying all of this is being under the control of strange adults!
A Sacred Task
Now, it is popular to think of all teachers as being wonderful people choosing to make a career out of this sacred task, but this is not true. I can think back through all of the teachers I have had, the many anecdotes Eldon has shared with me, all of the stories my friends have shared with me, and certainly through all of the teachers our sons have had, and yes, there are some truly bright lights that shine out. However, there are numerous teachers who do the bare minimum, who think of our precious kids as some kind of commodity they have to put up with, who get off on the power they hold and actually enjoy telling kids off. I know this is not a politically correct thing to discuss, but I also know that it is the truth.
Unfortunately, the problem is not just with the teachers as there are all the kids, vying to be top dog. Some kids are bullied badly, but most kids experience some of this at some point or another. The caricatures that make for great, hysterically funny, school based movies, are not so funny in real life. The mean girls mentality is a real thing. I know, for me, all I ever wanted in school was to be normal and accepted, and I know this holds for the vast majority of kids.
False Trust
It was a very sad moment when I realized that the emotional trauma I experienced to differing degrees throughout my school days, is actually commonplace, even normal! Within us all, there is a hurt, insecure child who relives the humiliations we have buried, and pains we dare not share. But we forget about them, and tell our kids how much fun they will have in school and how quickly they will adjust. We trust the government and the school system to take care of our kids, but this trust is betrayed over and over again. And we really cannot expect anything else as no one can take care of our kids and love them as we do.
Helping Our Children
Today, I know for a fact that our children need more help. They need someone to talk to, someone who sees through the brave face they put on things, someone who does not gloss over their problems telling them that tomorrow will be better. They need a way to believe in themselves, even when the going gets tough. As our two boys were growing up, we played InnerTalk programs to them frequently; picking up whichever title we thought was appropriate at the time. Today, based on my recent experience, we should have played InnerTalk programs for them even more—every night! Right now we cannot change the system, but we can do everything in our power to diminish the damage being done to our children’s psyches.
We offer a large range of InnerTalk titles—prosperity and staying young are amongst the most popular issues. Our least popular titles are our titles for children 
. I had not planned on having any special offer in this week’s newsletter, but now I feel I have to because this is just too important. As such, our most important kid’s programs are being offered at a 50% discount.* Choose from:
- I Can: Building a Child’s Esteem
- Leadership for Young People
- Freedom from Stress in School
- Joy of School
- School Phobia
- Positive Interactions for Young People
And to heal your own inner child at the same deep discount, choose from:
Plus: you can still take advantage of the Buy 4 Get 1 Free offer.
Wishing you Love, Light, and Laughter, always!
Ravinder Taylor
P.S. If you enjoy these newsletters, please remember to share them with your friends and family. There are easy share buttons at the top of this newsletter. You can also friend Me and Eldon on Facebook as we both love interacting with you all. You can also read (and subscribe to) Eldon’s regular blog here.
*This is a limited time special offer that expires at midnight pacific time on Sunday, September 18th, 2016
Due to licensing agreements, this offer is not valid in Malaysia, Singapore, Brunei, Viet Nam, U.K. or Ireland.
Please contact our distributors in those territories to see what specials they are offering.
Remember*
Buy 4 Get 1 Free!
Purchase any 4 items in our store (choosing from single programs, instantly downloadable MP3s, collections, albums, libraries, etc.), and get a 5th one free of charge.** Our cart can now handle this all automatically so there are no coupon codes to remember. PLUS: there are no limitations—buy 8 items and get 2 more items for free, buy 16 items and get 4 more items free! PLUS: You can also instantly download the single versions of most of our InnerTalk titles for ONLY $25.95! Click here!
*Please note: it will be the least expensive items in the cart that will become free!
The Science of InnerTalk
Remember, InnerTalk has been researched at numerous independent universities and institutions (such as Stanford University), and been demonstrated effective at priming how you speak to yourself. When your self-talk changes, so does the reality you experience!
“My 8 year old son seemed to be having a rough period at school. Within a few weeks his ‘Friday Folder’ reports from school were showing positive feedback. On his report card he went up in 14 areas!! I’m very proud of my son but better yet he is proud of himself. Thanks for the boost.”
~ M. S.
********************
Explore the Entire InnerTalk
Line Now!
Enter Here
********************