Not long ago I was speaking to a young man about the stressful nature of high school—he was basically asking me for tools to deal with it. As I went through my normal repertoire of techniques, I quickly realized that there was one key that was frequently glossed over if not simply ignored. You see, this young man sincerely wanted my assistance but my ideas were just not practical in his eyes. “If I don’t have enough time to do all of my homework, how can I take the time to meditate and add InnerTalk to my life in order to deal with the stress?” he argued. He refused to accept the idea that, if he were not feeling overwhelmed with the stress, then his productivity would naturally improve. In fact, he found plenty of excuses why none of my techniques could possibly help him.
What I realized through this discussion was that the most important component necessary for change, was desire. You have to ‘want’to change, and this holds true regardless of the arena of changes you are looking at, from health to success, from personal relationships to your education, etc. Now, while this may appear to be obvious, let’s look at this a little further.
Self-Sabotage
If your inner desires are in conflict with your stated goals, then self-sabotaging mechanisms can kick-in and failure is often the result. As I have said before, self-sabotage is a mechanism used by your subconscious mind to protect you from future hurt. So, for example, if you were humiliated in school while giving a class presentation, as an adult your subconscious defense strategies could prevent you from achieving positions of power because you would then have to give presentations to groups of people. Lots of these self-sabotaging mechanisms have their roots in the past, they serve no functional purpose today and it is only habit that keeps them in place.
InnerTalk programs are a very effective tool for combating self sabotage as they are all about changing beliefs from the inside out, bringing your inner goals in line with your outer desires. But they can only work if you play the programs! Unfortunately, if you really do not want to change, then even if you have purchased the programs, you will find an excuse not to play them.
Resistance
Sometimes, customer service phone calls can appear to come in bunches. Recently, I spoke to two separate customers regarding our Health and Wellness programs. Both complained of discomfort when using the programs—one said that the programs made her irritable, while the other said she just could not stand the music. I explained to both of them the nature of resistance, where the subconscious mind is not ready to give up its habituated way of thinking. Resistance, while annoying, can actually be a very good sign as it means that the affirmations on the InnerTalk program are pushing the right buttons. I also shared with the one customer the fact that you can have the same music set to two different set of subliminal affirmations, and they could hate one of the programs and love the other. It is therefore not the music that they disliked, but rather they were just experiencing some resistance to the affirmations, and the resistance was expressing itself as a very vocal dislike of the music and a general irritation. This is something I have experienced myself a couple of times over the last 25+ years.
There are a number of ways you can deal with resistance.
- Many customers simply work through it, playing the program until the resistance has gone.
- For myself, I like to take a break from the program for a week or two. When I then play the program again, I generally find that the resistance has gone. It is as though the subconscious mind needs some time to adjust to the new way of thinking.
- It is also worth reading the affirmations out aloud, slowly and meaningfully. Often times it is possible to tell which affirmations are causing the resistance, and this insight can provide direction as well.
Of course, if the resistance is profound we suggest discontinuing the use of the program and speaking to a health care professional or therapist. A strong negative reaction to positive affirmations could indicate deeper issues that are best addressed with professional guidance-—but this is extremely rare.
Choices
So, back to my two customers who were having very similar experiences. They both had health conditions, both believed in the mind’s ability to heal, and both said that they wanted to get better. Both of these customers said that my explanation regarding resistance made perfect sense to them, and they could even think of possible reasons for the resistance. One customer thanked me for my help and said she would try the different techniques I had suggested. A few weeks later, she called me back to let me know that the resistance had passed and that she was feeling a lot better. The other customer however, in spite of telling me that she thought she knew where the resistance originated, chose not to continue working with the program. Quite frankly, she did not have the real desire for change.
If you are unsure of your outer goal, when you are not ready to let go of the protection afforded to you by failure, then you will find plenty of excuses not to use all of the available tools. When real change is what you want, when you really want to finally achieve success, then you will do what it takes to do so. In this instance, InnerTalk is the perfect tool to change the self-sabotaging self-talk into the life-affirming self-talk that supports your goals. When you inner beliefs are in line with your outer goals, then success is infinitely easier.
What is it that you truly desire?
Wishing you Love, Light and Laughter, always!
Ravinder Taylor
P.S. If you enjoy these newsletters, please remember to share them with your friends and family. There are easy share buttons at the top of this newsletter. You can also friend Eldon and Me on Facebook as we both love interacting with you all. You can also read (and subscribe to) Eldon’s regular blog here.
~ K.C.
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